Unmotivated

i dont want to work anymore






:-(

I wonder if I could tie the ocean to your knees....

How many new begginnings can one person stand, everything changes so fast, everyone changes so fast, I am learning that I change fast too, everynight this week and next week (except monday night for obvious reasons) I am staying home, I am not going out, after work I drive home, get a cup of coffee on the way or what have you, then I stay in, play my guitat, watch Heroes, read...

I like reading, I have been taking my time with a couple of books the last couple of weeks, its been very intersting how, when you take a day off from reading, you come back to the book with a different perspective.

On another note, I m very intersted in vocal harmonys, they have been intriguing me as of late, I need a laptop to work on my music....

thats it for now

Amazing

Never take it seriously. if you never take it seriosuly, you never get hurt. if you never get hurt, you always have fun, and if you ever get lonely, just go to the record store and visit your friends

this, that and the other thing...

You fell apart at the parties of the upper class
You drank to much, now a picture says a thousand words
I am trying to say, what I want to say

One year ago

Try as I may im unable to speak
I grab you by the arm, I stroke you on the cheek
Your bed is unmade like everything is
Dark little heaven at the top of the stairs
Take me like that, ruin it all
Then build it again by the light in the hall
I drop to my knees ,say please darling please
Ill kill who you hate
Take off that dress you wont freeze

One more night

I start with your back, Cause that’s what he sees
When she is breaking my heart, she still f***s like a tee
Released to the sky look me straight in the eye
and tell me right now, That you wish I would die
You wont touch me again
So take what you can, leaving me empty just because Im a man
So good when it ends, we will never be friends
One more night, that’s all we can spend

One more night

The end should be a good one

One more night

I guess I sleep in my talk...er... wait...

So I have always known that I talk in my sleep, but, back when I was a heathen (HA) I was dating a girl named ***** (ha you thought I was going to say her name didnt you!) anyways, This was quite a few years ago, I pretty much lived in *****'s apartment in downtown Seattle, we spooned alot, it was glorious she had a little dog, I hated that dog, she loved that dog. We had a good relationship, went on trips together, talked about life, saw shows together, speant time with each others families, all in all we were pretty close, one situation sticks out in my mind from this relationship... let me share it with you....

I guess I have told some deep secrets in my sleep that made my last girlfriend feel "incredably close" to me, she told me the next morning when we woke up (after i made breakfast in bed and started the laundry of course) she said "she was glad we talked last night" that she feels she knows me "deeper then before" she said she "promises not to talk about it again" she "understands how hard it must have been to confide in her" and she is incredably gratefull and thankfull that I felt close enough to tell her about "that" I still dont know what the hell i told her.

Dear man from the cafe...

Yes, The french fries are self serve

Yes, they have provided servery utensiles for the purpose of trasfering the food product from the counter to your plate

HOWEVER

The french fries are not to be enjoyed while you are waiting for your Rueban sandwich, Please stop nuzzling your fingers into the serving container and picking forth french fries at your leasure, its disgusting, and it makes me not want french fries, and belive me, I LOVE my french fries.

This is the third time this week that I have stood next to you while you "grazed" keenly on the french fries, those hot crispy nuggets of gold deserve a better fate then your Plaque filled teeth, and engorged belly.

Also, please brush your teeth, you fit the "Computer programming stereo type" all to well

Sincerely:

The World

The life I need

Speaking of hitting the nail on the head....

My lungs will take you for granted

I spent the better part of two days in the studio recording some new material, It made me want this more then ever... I really want too finish something good! something I can be proud of, I really think this record label is a good idea, It seems like everyone involved has the same ideas about music that I do....

Adrian is amazing at arranging, he has brought some life to my music that I have been missing, something new to my sound, I really enjoy the direction we are going.

I started moving into my new place today, I am very excited about the guys that I will be living with, Dusty has more shoes then I do!

Aldous Huxley is currently my favorite author, I am reading "brave new world" right now and hope to have it finished by the time I land in denver tommorrow morning, THEN I will be reading Slaughterhouse Five by Vonegut on the flight home....


I like reading again.

YWAM Shooting

In Arvada Colorado this morning two young Missionary's were shot and killed at Youth With Mission base just outside of Denver.

I visited this Base about two years ago and got to know a couple of the staff members, luckily no one that I knew was hurt in the shooting, but there are two family's mourning the loss of there children.

I can never understand people who take the lives of the innocent, whether they believe our religion is wrong, or our ideals are unjust, that is still no reason to take the lives of innocent people, as much as today is a day to mourn, it also is a day to rejoice.... God has already shown his power in situations like this... I pray for the families of the newly departed, and I pray for the man who is responsible... there is nothing that anyone can do to deserve such a thing, may god be with you all.

I have a secret love for Gavin Degraw

and Maroon 5, Just a little obsessed, there is something about there songs that bring back memories.

So, I have been writting alot of new songs, but the same thing happends everytime, I will get half way through a song, I will get to the bridge, and go totally blank.... Its hard, because there are some good tihngs that I have been working on and I want to finish them, I just dont know how... I dont know what I want to say...

Its funny, its a very similer situation that I am in with the rest of my life, I just dont know what to say, where to go, what to do, its rather lame... BUT I am learning that I will never have total control over my life, over what happends in my life, over where my life takes me, I find comfort in that!

I leave for colorado in a week, how excited am I, I cant wait to see my little guy, he is getting so big, I guess Sarah told him I was coming and he ran up to his room and grabbed his picture of me and kissed it!!!! I almost cried

this is what makes my head spin!

I am very excited about friday night!!!!

Bare feet and blurry eyes

We stand on a mountain top and revel in the view
We swim in the ocean, we walk through the forest

There are so many times in our lives that we "see" things that we have not seen before.

We are called to be set apart, but to observe, we must know what we are fighting, what we are running from, what we are running for. This life is a race, i don't care what any body says, how for you run, how long you run, determines where you end up.

Its kind of staggering when you think of it, when does it end? when does it let up? can we ever stop and rest? man I wish I had the answer to those questions. one thing I do know, I am still running, and I plan on running for a long time.

I am tired, this day is dragging, I need new music in Itunes


I want a cheeseburger

Hear our prayers Lord

Hear our cries Lord, Hear our prayers
Take our burdens, calm our fears
God will you make us, a people that love you
Please take our offereings, that we set before you
God hear our prayers, That were lifting up to you
God see our tears, that were struggling to see through
God hear our prayers, to you

In our weakness, you remain
when were broken, you sustain
and God will you make up, a people that love you
please take our offereings, that we set before you
God hear our prayers, that were lifting up to you
God see our tears that, were struggling to see through
God hear our prayers, we lift them to you
Lord make our hearts true
God hear our prayers
We lift them to you
will you make our hearts true

will you hear our prayers Lord

God will you make us, a people that love you
Please take our offereings, that we set before you
God hear our prayers that, were lifting up to you
God se our tears that were striuggling to see through
God hear our prayers as we lift the to heaven
Were praying the angels recieve and embrace them
God hear our prayer

Ben Gibbard and the meaning of life!

Last night was a great time, Barcelona, as usual, was great, I got to see some old freinds, Brightwood from Portland, they put on a great show.

Search/Rescue, also, very good show, It was great to see Ryan and Bobby from Gatsbys playing again.

There is something to be said about seeing someone you admire in a public setting, last night Ashlea and Myself with a couple of other friends were sitting at the Moe bar on capital hill, pining over Miller high life, I catch a glimpse of a young man walking by.... none other then Ben Gibbard of Death Cab and The Postal Service fame...

what did I do?

I could have been "that guy" that pesters him about when the new Postal Service album is coming out... or made a social comment on importance of the Seattle music scene thanks to him and his bands, I could have screamed "I am your biggest fan, I celebrate your entire catalog, do you think you will ever play 'sock hop' live at a show? 'All Time Quarterback' was SEMINAL in my days Post high school... THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!"

BUT

I didnt, let him quietly pass by, use the restroom, and sit back down, undisturbed.

will he ever thank me for it? highly unlikely... but I feel I did him a service, now, if you dont mind, I am going to go listen to the "All Time Quarterback" album I was talking about.

Guess what...

I did it







it worked out well for me!!!!!